As I recover from bringing in the New Year with some amazing people I can’t help but to reflect on 2014…Our family has had it fair share of ups & downs over the years, luckily this last year we did get to experience more ups!! However, this past year has been the toughest on myself since losing my biggest fans & supporters: my mama & papa. (Hard to believe it is going on four years)
I am not one to share a lot of my personal life or experiences and I most certainly am not one to wear my heart on my sleeves…I put on a smile and save my grief for behind closed doors (which has played a toll.) As a result, I have become more introverted and found that I shut myself off…never has that been a part of my personality!!!
I guess in a way this new way of being helped me to get to where I am…I was able to truly dive into my roles of a wife, mama & photographer, but I often found myself hiding behind all of my duties allowing monotony to settle in; keeping me from truly enjoying my surroundings. Although ultimately, it allowed me to see who and what was important in my life (a blessing in disguise!!)
Personally, it has kept me from making new relationships and friendships…and has changed many that were already in place. Some have grown ever so strong, while others have withered away.
As for my business, it allowed me to focus on my business plan, brand & style…to allow for me to become more comfortable in my shoes and be consistent with my delivery. However, this burden of my shell has kept me from truly getting my name out there and reaching more people!!! Then there was that inner battle of self doubt where I often questioned whether or not my work was good enough (in those moments I longed ever so more for my precious cheerleaders)…which too, hindered my networking and social drive.
An ongoing whirlwind that I strive to change!!!
With a New Year upon us we will see all sorts of “New Year, New Me” or “Resolutions”…all great things to aid us in the direction we want our lives to go. With big things in store for 2015, I am making a commitment to Go BIG or Go home…and instead of a list of resolutions, I am going to write my Vows again; but this time to myself!!!
I vow to be social again…I will not shut myself off and hide in my shell. This means I strive to take advantage of more networking opportunities, harbor relationships and to let people I meet know more about me, especially the fact that I could be their go to photographer!!!
I vow to be bubbly again, more open and less shy!!
I vow to make some time for myself each day, to allow for unwinding & a recharge!!
I vow to be my own biggest cheerleader and to not be as hard on myself…to always give 110%!!!
I vow to live!!! To truly enjoy each day, with the good & the bad…and most importantly, to never give up!!!
Here’s to day 1 of our 365 days in this 2015 Chapter of Life!! Happy New Year Friends!!!